For You

You make me smile
and believe me
smiling isn't something I do very often

Baby Doll

Maybe I loved you
I probably did
I can't remember
who can tell?
Maybe I needed you
once upon a time
maybe I wanted to
maybe I tried
I wanted something
heavy but soft
you provided
that cushion on which to fall

Far Away Eyes

Implore me
explore me
soak me up like a sponge
I am the pariah
the martyr
that forgotten song
we sing when we're dying
our hearts scream the symphony
silently appealing
to any God that will listen
hear me holler
yell and bother
to explain the unexplained
trapped in a cave
you want the comfort that you cannot afford
I cannot fix you
I cannot save you
you're lost without me
and I'm whole without you
but maybe one day
when my hair is gray
I'll have the guts to say
I loved you once
when you were innocent
when lies didn't spew out of your mouth
were you lying from the beginning?
Question marks the spot.

Dreams

I was a cast away
drifting at sea
casting out signals
that was me
I was the answer
I was the key
to a stupid puzzle
that was me
I was a navy nurse
once upon a time
funny how I
drown in the wine
what happened to me
when I was so small
I remember the glasses
spindle top cases
drowning so simply
I float to the top
remember your president
remember your ghost
the future reminds you
what do you know?

Memory

When I fade away
like a distant memory
who will remember me?
I want to be remembered for my heart
not my mind
as if there were even a question
of where I'm going
and how I'll get there
I want to know
if the grass grows greener
on the other side

Don't Call Me

The new messiah
I am old
wrinkled hands
nineteen years
is all it took
for this pain
to shrink into a box
and fade away
put your hands up
and pray the new way
pray to yourself first
before praying to me
I am my own God
I make my own decisions
the echo of my emotions
the karma that I control
I wish
upon a star
that she'll wake up
and say "Hello"
to the new secrets
that life in a box provides
and I lay here
beside myself
waiting for the moment of truth
when they all realize
it was me
all along
waiting for their thoughts
life is a shell
tiny and small
and what I want is
two people to speak with me
tell me that they know what I say is true
but that won't happen will it
I won't get my apostles
because all I am
in the end
is crazy

Caress

Calm burning hands
caress me
tell me that I'm alright
and you lay there
blonde tresses spread around you
your nightmares make you feel as if
you were nothing but a dream
wayward angel
do you know your path?
it leads to me
I've been waiting here for you
for days it seems
and all I want to know is
will you answer?
will you tell me I'm not crazy
that you feel it too?
wayward angel
open up your hands
let me slide into them
let me hold you
still you wait
telling me you want me to slowly
carefully
enter your eager body
and all you can do
while I fill your space
is tell me
silently
you wanted it that way
I'm going to New York
where the streets don't know me
and the people don't care
I'm gonna get spit on like trash
I want to be
I want to lean into the city
breathe life into it
make it whole
black berry phones
do you want an answer?
yes
I do want you
your soul is so delicate
I want to touch it
hold it in my hands
I want to breathe you in
the angels said
"she is yours"
but who is she?
where does she live?
"far away"
and there I stood
silently waiting
angry poems
the world divides us
I am the warm gulf wind
blowing at your sails
waking up your dreams
making you whole
a capsized ship
crashes into the water
and I'm underneath
drowning